i seriously dont think im there yet..
but i hope with God's grace,
ill be there in no time.
i need time to think through
have my doubts answered...
and thank God, there's xin ying.
phew.
ill think abt this chapter again tomorrow..
serious thoughts.
i think im too confused to make sense with myself.
______________________________________________________________________________________

one of the parts that caught my attention was...
"There are 3 barriers that block our total surrender to God: fear, pride, and confusion."
and my, im kinda struck by fear and confusion...
i kind of got over the fear that my aunt will go mad abt it
im sure God will bring me through that, surely.
there are times, during sermon, the bible makes God sound like he's so angry
it kinda instil that fear in me.
to me, God is very kind and always forgiving and perhaps, when He is portrayed to be angry and fuming at man's sins in the bible, it seems so unimaginable...
but i always recount what yuying told me
God is very happy when we pray to him one :) :)
somehow, at that point of time, when i heard this...
it's so Fatherly, Father-like. u know, just like any parent,
they'd be glad to listen to their children speak to them! :)
perhaps, the human race is getting too disappointing... :(
sometimes the news just makes people feel jaded...

"[God] woos us to himself so that we might offer ourselves freely to him".
yeps, that's how i feel sometimes.
2 years ago, i forsook Him..i thought, if it's meant to be, it will come back to me
and it did..boy, im so glad it did, really :)
it's like u just know it, u know God really came back for u
and somehow, yeah, i feel saved.
i feel like wow great, He didnt forsake me...
ah :)

-dont edge others out, dont demand your rights, arent self-serving-

honest reflections. *
10:20 AM